Comprehensive schools are an unmitigated success and everyone is equal…Aren’t they?

By Mike Stallard

You don’t have to be a religious American (“We hold these truths to be self evident…..”) to believe that all men are created equal. We Socialists have always passionately believed in the equality of people too – the classless society.

But equal does not mean identical.

Some people are not interested in becoming academics. They do not want to study for ever. They want to get out into the real world and start work. They want to settle down with a family. They want to see the world. They most certainly do not want to spend the only time of their lives when they will be unburdened with care, doing homework.

These people form the backbone of every town and village. They are always there. They know the place as their home. They live there with their extended family and their many friends. They provide the local services, run the local shops, sit on the local Council, join the local Trade Union and perhaps even today go to the local church or chapel. They govern the local schools and join the local Police. They are the salt of the earth.

Other people are in need of special attention. Through no fault of their own, they are born with spina bifida, with Attention Deficit Disorder, with Dyslexia or with epilepsy. These people need special help and attention.

And then there are the boffs. They want to sit indoors doing their homework. They are desperate to know about Latin Verbs. They lose sleep over their test results. They are quite prepared to spend their adolescent years writing coursework (without Mummy’s help) and learning abstruse dates and figures and chemistry tables. They even care about simultaneous equations. Social life? Forget it! Boffs don’t really fit into ordinary schools. They get bullied quite a bit too. They are scorned by normal people.

In the past these three kinds of people had three kinds of different schools which were smallish and tailored to the needs of their people. Because everyone knew everyone else, individual needs were catered for and teachers could specialise. People, even parents, felt accepted. You knew their names. There was one smallish secondary school in pretty well every village or small town, giving a sense of belonging. It worked very well. And it still does in Lincolnshire where, even today, difficult children from London comprehensives are sent up to start a successful new life.

Then along came Comprehensive Education in the 70s, and with it enormous, anonymous schools which threw all these very different kinds of people together into one huge melting pot.

That was some thirty years ago, but even today we are not allowed to question Comprehensive Education, because in Comprehensive Schools everyone is equal. Everything in the garden is lovely. Children love being there because they are all treated identically. Teachers love working in them because all teachers hate elitism. The Comprehensive Schols are an unmitigated success. And they’re the future of Socialism too!

Aren’t they?